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Why women cheat on their husbands? Often an affair is a cry for help. Usually a woman cheats on her husband when they are in some kind of emotional pain. The pain could stem that she married for the wrong reasons. She wasn't really in love when she married and still isn't. Some women marry for all the wrong reasons in the first place (money, pressure from family and/or friends, wants to have children etc)
The affair usually isn't the main problem in the relationship but moreso a symptom of mutual disconnection, lack of intimacy and a feeling of emptiness. The women that cheat on their husbands are usually unable to directly communicate their emptiness and pain to their partner so they run to another for that connection (which is usually temporary). The other man is probably making them feel special and showing the attention that is emotionally and physically missing in the marriage.
Another reason for the affair is that they could be trying to punish their husband for something that he did to her that she feels wronged by.
Some women feel that having a lover will resolve or improve their relationships with their husband. It is important to remember that you cannot fix what is wrong in your marriage by adding another complication. Having an affair does not make you a horrible person. It is a sign that something else is seriously wrong in your relationship or it could be that you have just grown away from that relationship in your life and you just aren't in love any longer.
All relationships will come to a point where there will be problems. The newlywed stage doesn't last forever. An affair is really something to try and avoid. Face the problems in your marriage head on. Not all marriages last forever unfortunately and it is best to try and get out of the marriage first before looking elsewhere. The affair just takes your problems, makes them worse and adds a whole new set of problems.
Are you a woman who cheated on their husband and regrets it? Did it make you realize that you really do want your marriage? Always keep in mind that adultery is a forgiveable act. It is important to remember what caused you to cheat on your husband? Adultery is usually a symptom of an existing problem already and you have to figure out that problem.
Once you either confess the affair to your husband or get caught, do not expect immediate forgiveness. You are going to feel guilty, you are going to feel sad. Your husband will need time to go through the motions as well (Shock, anger, sadness, pain). He may or may not forgive you. If he does, the trust will be broken for a while. Prepare yourself for that. Let your husband show his feelings. Do not get angry or defensive. As I have always said in my articles, always try to put yourself in your partner's shoes. If you were him, how would you react?
Reassure your husband of your love. Recall special times that you have shared with him as a family. Talk and listen. Validate his feelings. He is going to feel angry, betrayed and sad. If you want your marriage to overcome this, you need to also end the affair and work on rebuilding the trust.
An affair can be overcome. I am living proof. My husband and I weren't married yet back when I cheated. We had been living together for about 2 years when I cheated with my ex-boyfriend. It was difficult but we got past it. That was 5 years ago that I cheated (we have been together for 7) It is never even mentioned. We are happier than ever. I think the cheating actually made us both realize that we loved each other and didn't want to lose each other. This made us put in the extra effort to make the relationship work. Yes, we did see a relationship counselor also.
If you can't overcome the affair or just simply don't want the marriage any longer, than it is time to close that chapter in your life. Life is to short to live with regret.
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