Taking responsibility and holding ourselves fully accountable for our actions can be regarded as the foundation for success in almost anything but it is especially true when we want to get ex back and we accept that the break up was due to the mistakes we made.
Before I go any further this is not about beating you up or walking about in sack cloth and ashes repenting for the mistakes that were made. It’s about forgiveness and moving forward in a positive way.
That doesn’t mean just forgetting all about what went wrong. Take that attitude and you will get nowhere in your quest to get your ex back. Spend time working out what mistakes you made, why you made them, and what you can do to stop making them again. Remember the old saying – do what you have always done, and you will get what you have always gotten. Doesn’t sound like a success strategy for relationship building, does it?
The first thing I want you to do is ask yourself three fundamental questions…
- Are you still in love with your ex?
- Even if you are, is the relationship really and truly worth saving, can it be made even stronger?
- Are you prepared to admit it was your fault AND take action now to get ex back?
I wonder how many people know that if they had but tried, they could have restored their relationship and successfully got back with their ex. Maybe they wouldn’t want to hear that now. So, please don’t make another mistake by not trying to get your ex back.
I have mentioned in other articles that there needs to be time and space after every break up before there is any attempt at getting back together. The amount of time and space is going to vary from one relationship to another. The amount of time and space is going to vary depending on whether the break up was an amicable on or it was one full of anger and emotion. I can advise you to take the time, give each other space. What I cannot do is tell you for how long. Only you can make that decision.
So, three more questions for you…
- What clues are there when your relationship was working that can help you get ex back?
- Here’s the big one – are you prepared to forgive yourself for the mistakes you made? If you can’t, this will be obvious and will seriously damage any attempts you make in getting back together.
- Are you prepared to be patient, knowing it will be worth it?
Those who read my articles regularly will know that reconciliation is all about effective communication. By effective I mean positive and non-blaming. I mean focusing on the other person by being attentive and caring in conversation.
You will know when you are ready. You will know when you have forgiven yourself and taken step to remedy the mistakes that were made in the past. Now, go and talk with your ex.
Don’t rush things. You may be at peace with yourself and the situation but how is your ex still feeling? What is he or she still thinking. You ex may still need more time and space for his or her personal healing process to take effect. Be prepared to let that happen. By being positive and supportive you will help that process.
When your ex realizes just how important he or she is to you, you will be well on the way to answering “how to get ex back”. If you are really thinking about how to get your ex back, then click here and learn more.